In Her Shell
Saturday, February 07, 2009
  What Was In The Basement (A Dramatic Scene)
Wonderturtle is sitting on the lid of the toilet, clipping her toenails. She hears Anthemsled come up the stairs.

Anthemsled: Huh.
Wonderturtle: What?
AS: I found our squeaky friends.
WT: Really? What were they?
AS: Bats.
WT: No shit.

(She comes out of the bathroom.)

WT: What did you do?
AS: I threw them outside; they are right there, you can see them if you come here.

(WT comes to the stair landing, where AS is standing looking out the window. She nobly says nothing about the fact that he is standing in his slippers on a damp spot that she just mopped.)

AS: Look straight down. They don't seem to be doing very well.
(She looks down to the space between their house and the next. In the snow are two bats, tangled together and feebly moving their limbs.)
WT: Maybe they're sick.
AS: They looked pretty exhausted and dehydrated. They were curled up together in a bucket that I was going to use.

(They watch the bats pathetically struggling in the snow.)

AS: I don't really want to watch their struggle for survival.
WT: Do we have a shovel?
AS: What? (He looked at her, horrified.)
WT: Well, if you feel bad, you could use it to scoop them up and put them under a bush or something, where it might be warmer.
AS: They probably don't like how bright it is.

(They look out the window again.)

WT: I'm glad you found them and not me. I probably would have screamed and left them there.

(AS says nothing, watches the bats. His face is hidden by the curtain, but he seems mournful.)

WT: Wherever we live, we are going to be where wildlife used to live. We're bound to have some interactions that are...
AS: Unpleasant.

(He keeps watching the bats.)

AS: Hey, one of them seems better! He's walking!

(WT looks out the window.)

WT: I see one...
AS: (excited) The other one just walked away down there! (Indicating the direction right below them, toward the outside wall of the house.)
AS: They're moving! Good for them!

(WT laughs. AS glares at her.)

AS: What?
WT: Hopefully not back into the basement.
AS: (disgusted, walking back down the stairs) I think they've learned their lesson.

(WT decides now is not the time to speculate aloud on the discerning powers of two freezing, possibly ill bats who are scrambling for warmth and darkness. She goes back upstairs.)

I hope there's nothing in your belfry! I would have rigged explosives and bought a new house.
Ha. I was actually glad it was bats and not squirrels or mice. They seem less likely to nest and profligate for some reason.
Eek! I am glad I didn't know this when I was there. I hate bats.
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Just today I remembered reading something in the Neighbor News about some rare sort of bat fungus that is making them malnourished, so they come out of hibernation but then can't find food and die. Hopefully this is not the case because it would be sad and we will have more bugs come summer.
wow. i wonder if they were there during the housewarming waiting for all of us 'toursits' to stop looking at their new home!! Glad you found them without any peril, and I'm going to pretend they found a nice secret cave to live in. -snix
Sure, you'd rather they were bats and not mice. Until you wake up at 4am to use the toilet and one of them flaps by your head, and you scream, and then the bat flies into the living room and flops all over your curtains, and then you lose sight of it, and it emerges again the next night, and you have to dress up in your winter coat and trap it in a cardboard box while it shrieks and flaps its wings at you...
Snix: Actually, they decided to seek shelter under our garbage cans, and AS had to scoop them up in the snow shovel and relocate them under the bushes at the far end of the yard. It was cool to see them stretching their wings out on the ground. I don't think they are long for this world though.

Bubs: I'm sensing there is a story there...
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