In Her Shell
Saturday, July 22, 2006
  I Feel You, Nancy Kerrigan

I have been pulled over by a cop four times now, and I always get a ticket. Always! This time it was for rolling through a Stop sign, and the cop's cuteness and his choice of "Careless Driving" instead of "Failure to stop" on the ticket and his babbling about how I could appear in court and plea down the points and his apologetic justifications about how it is a dangerous corner and a lot of people get hit there so I should really be more careful did little to mollify me because I always get a ticket!

I am very polite but I do not cry on cue. I can't even bring myself to look scared. My roommate managed to get stopped in the same spot for speeding and rolled away without a ticket. Who are all of these people who get so-called "warnings" and how do they do it?

Why God. Why.
 
Comments:
I think it has something to do with short skirts and big smiles.
 
I think Monica Lewinsky might know.
 
Be a baby-faced woman pulled over by a male cop. That's according to research by Brandeis Univ. psychologist Leslie Zebrowitz. You look vulnerable and trustworthy and will therefore send the message that you didn't speed intentionally and won't do it again. If you're not baby-faced, figure out how to cry at will. That might produce the same effect, but it hasn't been empirically verified. Anecdotally speaking, I can say that being young, pretty, and tearful got me a warning 2/2. I still intentionally speed.
 
Sorry about the ticket. Getting one always sucks.

Back when I still wrote speeding tickets, I was taught by my training officer to ALWAYS write the good-looking girls, so they have to show up for court and all your buddies can see them.

For what it's worth, I never gave breaks to girls who flirted. I felt insulted. Harried moms and working stiffs got breaks, not chicks who showed leg or unbuttoned the top few buttons on the blouse.
 
Post a Comment



<< Home

My Photo
Name:

In a move that seems to amuse only me, I pull lines from the blogs I hit on the Next Blog button, and arrange them into found poem form.



April 2006 / May 2006 / June 2006 / July 2006 / August 2006 / September 2006 / October 2006 / November 2006 / December 2006 / January 2007 / February 2007 / March 2007 / April 2007 / May 2007 / June 2007 / July 2007 / August 2007 / September 2007 / October 2007 / November 2007 / December 2007 / January 2008 / February 2008 / March 2008 / April 2008 / May 2008 / June 2008 / July 2008 / August 2008 / September 2008 / October 2008 / November 2008 / December 2008 / January 2009 / February 2009 / March 2009 / April 2009 / May 2009 / June 2009 / July 2009 / August 2009 / September 2009 / October 2009 / December 2009 / January 2010 / August 2010 / April 2011 /


Powered by Blogger